T.I.A.

I know it's been almost a week since I've posted an update. Let me go ahead and say that while I would've loved to post an update, I was a little preoccupied with "not dying."

Let me make a long and disturbing story nice and short for you by giving you a rundown of my weekend.

- Have you gotten food poisoning in America? I haven't, but I've had it in Africa!

- Have you ever had to provide a urine sample in a cup? In your drinking cup? Have you ever had to collect the urine sample and in the middle of collecting the sample your city was hit with an earthquake?

- If the doctor says, "Well, there is one more thing we can do to break the fever..." Say no and run away. Or crawl away. Just get away. Don't look back.

- Did I mention I was carrying around my own IV when I was collecting my urine sample?

- Has a doctor ever said to you, "Your body has started eating itself...it's not a good cycle."

- Have you ever had strange women pass out and fall into your room while you were hooked up to an IV? Me too.

- Make sure the first thing you drink when you get home isn't apple juice. Your body will just laugh and laugh and say, "Try again."

- Make sure your first solid food in 48 hours isn't Indian food.

I would like to publicly thank my wonderful roommates for ensuring that I survived June 14-17. I would also like to thank Kevin for mercilessly making fun of me every bizarre step of the way.

I would also like to thank Star Wars for being created, because I watched every movie this weekend.

I would also like to thank the four pounds of medicine I've swallowed in the past 48 hours. Because of you, I left the house today.

Anyway I'm fine now and I think I'll be ready for work in the morning. I just thought I would share my absurd misfortunes.

T.I.A.